As humans, it is easy to fixate on those who have wronged us, on flaws we feel we have, on situations that we wish had gone a different way. To be able to forgive others and ourselves is essential to living in peace and developing a healthy approach towards the future. To strive towards such goals, learning to forgive can seem like a task that requires much willpower and determination – it does – but it is a rewarding journey that allows us to see past all that has traumatised and wounded us, enabling a more fantastic future for everyone.

How to Forgive

Forgiving is about learning to move past what has gone wrong. Often, when we are angry, frustrated or sad, we fixate on the negative emotions associated with the event that caused us harm. When somebody wrongs us, we can spend years wondering if we will ever get an apology or make amends. The truth is, lengthy approaches that provide the guise of healing in the form of time will not make you feel any better, dragging out the healing process of the wounds you have received. It is harder, but far better, to be direct and approach forgiveness wholeheartedly to move on to bigger and better things.

Affirmations are great for overcoming insecurities and feelings of negativity that have grown from wrongdoings. To forgive ourselves, often, we need to believe that we have grown from what went wrong. Using positive affirmations to realign our mind and forget negative memories and unhelpful thought patterns is highly effective in replenishing and healing us. Healing through affirmations allows us to move on with a more effective, positive mindset.

If there is the potential for a healthy dialogue between you and the person who has wronged you, it is highly preferable. However, often it can harm us further to enter back into negative situations which negatively impacted our lives and self-knowledge, so you must be cautious in expecting apologies or approaching a person directly for forgiveness. While we may think we need closure, often, healthy closure is hard to come by. It can be better to seek closure alone through non-verbal forgiveness of the individual instead of a forced or potentially unhealthy conversation.

Guided meditation allows us to forgive by improving our state of mind through positive thought and providing the clarity and breadth we need to see different perspectives on situations we have lived. This is often important for personal growth and forgiveness of the self. We need to understand that the past cannot be changed and that it matters more what we do in future to rectify our lives than what occurred in the past and how we could have done it differently. Self-forgiveness using guided meditation is highly effective because it focuses deeply inward and allows for an intuitive sense of development regarding areas we feel need the most work and how we can resolve problems.

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